Pregnant and New Moms! Never Stop Believing in your Own Voice ..
August 19th, 2010 by Diane Sam
If you are a pregnant or new mom, unless you've been around babies all your life, you are entering into new territory, and like any adventurer, are sure to have a lot of questions.
Should I sleep with my baby? When should I wean? Is there something wrong? or is everything ok? Should I 'wear' my baby ... or just leave her in the car seat? How soon should I go back to work? Is it ok to supplement with formula once in awhile or should I stick to breastmilk? etc .......
Guess what? While there are a lot of great childbirth educators, doulas, lactation consultants and other trained professionals out there, there are also a lot of NEGATIVE, DIS-EMPOWERING cultural messages for new moms. So, here's what I have to say:
Never Stop Believing in Your Own Voice
When you are making a decision about something, take a few moments of silence. Breath deeply. Ask yourself how you feel about this, exactly what is influencing your thought patterns. Maybe someone made a judgemental comment about what you're doing, or you saw some sort of 'scary' TV show depicting birth as a medical emergency, etc.. or you hear the voice of your mom or your mother-in-law, or your sister, etc... What I'm asking you to do, before you make any major decision about birth or child care, is to calmly break it down a bit.
Feel it in your body. Do you still want to breastfeed? Do you think it's too early to introduce a bottle? Or do you just not want to? Do you feel that it is best to co-sleep? What does your heart tell you? What does it feel like in your stomach? If you don't want to do whatever you've been advised.. THEN DON'T. Seek out like minded-people, alternative options, and follow your motherly instincts.
People will give you all sorts of myths and commentary, they will label you, tell you outdated information as if it is the gospel truth ... you need to believe in your own voice.
Educate yourself in some modern ideas instead of just doing exactly what your mother did (hey, we love our moms, but the '70's and 80's weren't exactly enlightened times in the childbirth/breastfeeding area...).
You don't need to excuse, apologize or argue with anyone .. just believe in your own voice, and give yourself some quiet time to reflect before you make any major decisions based on a fear-based culture.
Anyone have any examples of when you believed in yourself? Let us know!
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